Here is an update as big as my heart:

Deaf Comedy Jam: For the past month or so, my ears have felt...weird. Like they were filled full of wax. Except I'd go to town with a Q-tip and I'd still feel clogged. Then about two weeks ago, after the Jersey All Pro Wrestling show, my ears were ringing like I'd sat front row at a Metallica show. This was odd because (a) although they played some music, it wasn't loud, and (b) we weren't sitting anywhere near the speakers.

Then last Wednesday something went seriously wrong with my left ear--everything started sounding all tinny, and if it was someone talking they sounded like a robot. That's bad. It got worse the next day, as I woke up dizzy as hell, unable to stand without leaning on something. It was so bad I had to call in sick (first time in five years).

So I go to the doctor (first time in four years for that) and apparently all the rain the past few months has caused me to be affected by allergies, even though I don't have any. I got some pills and it's starting to clear up, although not as fast as I'd like.

Cyber Sox Update: Edgar Renteria tore his ACL in a game against the Yankees. I loved how the announcers were "Let's hope it's not too serious." Hey geniuses, I think a torn ACL is the dictionary definition of "serious." Then Manny fractured his leg the next game. Awesome.


Stuff only I find funny: I love watching baseball tonight for any mention of the Twins' Jacques Jones. Jacques is a black man from San Diego. That just cracks me up for some reason. He should act like a stereotypical Frenchman: wear a beret with the Twins logo, carry a poodle around, eat Crepes in the dugout, and talk in a whiny French accent: "I vill hit zee ball into the uppah deck." Holy shit that's awesome.

Future stuff: I should be touring Fenway park this Thursday, and also talking about Freakonomics, M*A*S*H, and Lost.