Would would you do, given a chance to meet God?

Thursday, April 26, 2007


Lost has been good lately. It really bottomed out a few months back with the wretched Jack flashback with the scary Asian lady. Even worse, ABC promised answers to three big mysteries, and delivered…nothing, really.

Things did rebound nicely the next week with the episode about Hurley’s van, and have built from there. We found out some key things (who the eye patch guy was, why Claire was kidnapped, how Locke got paralyzed), some seemingly forgotten plot points were picked up again (Sun’s pregnancy, Charlie’s seemingly inevitable death), and of course, some new mysteries were introduced (Flight 815 being found with no survivors, Locke’s Dad in a Box).

The magic wishing box worries me – this could be cool or total Shark Jump Bait.

I guess the season is building to Juliet’s betrayal, and then…I don’t know. A final showdown with the Others? Season 1 and 2 had clear arcs where you knew an issue would be resolved in the season finale (the hatch for season 1, and the button for season 2). However, I’m excited and I can’t wait for next Wednesday. That means they’re doing their job.

However, if any of the following characters die, I will be PISSED: Jin, Hurley, Desmond, Locke, or Sawyer. I’m not hoping anyone else kicks off but I could live with it.

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Saw Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon The Movie Film For Theaters yesterday (sadly, I just asked for a ticket to “the Aqua Teen movie,” instead of pronouncing the film’s entire name). Tuesday seems like a weird day to see a movie, but the local Showcase North has $5 movie Tuesdays, and given the very limited release of the film, I wasn’t sure if it would be in theaters another weekend. And after the Mooninite Invasion of Boston, I felt the movie deserved to be seen in a theater.

Where to start? Well, we were specifically told not to disseminate the plot, but here are some thoughts:

--If you like the show, you’ll like the movie. It did drag in points, which isn’t surprising since you’re taking an 11 minute TV show and turning it into an 87 minute movie. That said, it was funny as hell, even if it didn’t make a lick of sense.

--The movie generally got bad reviews, which also isn’t surprising. I was baffled at points by what I was seeing, so I can’t fathom being a critic who’s never seen the show and had to sit through 87 minutes of in(s)anity.

--Best guest voice was a tie between Bruce Campbell as Chicken Bittle and Neil Peart as himself.

--The film is rated “R,” and there was plenty of swearing, although they bleeped an F bomb from Dr. Weird, even though “fuck” was clearly said at other points in the film.

--They worked in a reference to Bob Clark’s death, even though it occurred only 10 days before the film’s opening (I think it was Bob Clark, Cybernetic Ghost of Christmas Past was hard to understand at points).

--Best origin story ever.

--Where was Handbanana?

Monday, April 09, 2007

I went to Easter mass on Saturday. Bad idea. It ended up going two and a half hours. TWO AND A HALF HOURS.

There were extra readings and songs between each readings and candles and all sorts of extra-curricular activities. Some guy got baptized and confirmed on the same night. To me, that’s cheating – it’s like getting your learner’s permit and your driver’s license on the same day.

There were also two little kids getting their first communion. The girl was, no exaggeration, dressed like a bride. When they went up to the altar it was like the "Graansha" epsisode of Criminal Intent. Hopefully no one's sister was run down in the parking lot afterwards.

Also somewhat of note – the priest used the term “orgies” during his sermon. Granted, it was in reference to a biblical story.

I also saw a guy with a mullet, but he had it tied in a ponytail. Gotta looks your best for the holidays, I guess.

Friday, April 06, 2007

(Warning: this is really gross)

So after hosting a successful Wrestlemania Party on Sunday (OK, it was me and my buddy Chris, but we had fun), I was feeling a little funny. I just wrote it off as eating too much pizza and tried to go to bed. But I soon woke up and came to that terrible realization: I had to barf.

This was a sizable event, because I never vomit. Perhaps due to never drinking in excess, and an iron stomach, I had not vomited since freshman year of college (not due to drinking, I was just under the weather). It had been over a decade since I last drove the porcelain bus.

And vomit I did. “Blew chunks” is probably more appropriate. And no, I didn’t make it to the toilet quite in time.

Well, that was it, right? I probably just some bad salsa. But no, sadly, I got up and vomited four more times during the night.

Also, I had Super Diarrhea (TM American Dad) during the night as well, sometimes while I was vomiting (don’t ask for more details).

I called in sick the next day, which I never do. Thankfully around noon the storm had calmed, so to speak, and I slept all day. I even slept through the Red Sox opening game, which, looking at the results, wasn’t the worst idea.

I’m all better now, thank you. No idea what caused me to get this bug, but I did eat at a salad bar on Sunday. Maybe the sneeze guard just didn’t guard well enough…

(Told you this was gross)